FILMS : RUDY AND A PROPOSAL IN FAVOR OF INTENTIONAL ATTENTION.

A few years ago, we watched The Karate Kid with the kids.

Last year, we watched Hoosiers. 

And this weekend, we watched Rudy. 

( image: https://www.collectors.com/autograph/rudy-ruettiger-signed-notre-dame-rudy-movie-poster-8x10-pho/4889367550548704066 )

1984, 1986, 1993. Some good years.

These three films have something in common. Something besides being sports stories or movies about underdogs.

All three are ones I loved as a kid, and was a little afraid to watch later with our children, for fear that I had mis-remembered, and the magic would be gone. Just a good childhood memory from my past that the kids won't understand and that I'll watch with my adult eyes and be unimpressed; tarnishing the beloved recollections of the past.

That's happened. But not with these three. The above three films are ones that I loved when I was younger, and loved possibly even more after seeing them with my own children. 

Beautiful.

Rudy is the 1993 true story retelling of an undersized, underachieving kid who refused to let anyone stomp on his dream of playing football for Notre Dame.

How does everything end up? Watch the movie. Three things though that stand out. I made up an acronym:

ATTENTION

I don't wish to go through life grumbling about "...how good things used to be." What a waste of time. At the same time, it's valuable to look to history and to the past if we really care about learning and growing - learning from what worked, what didn't, and figuring out what we can do better.

Camille Paglia, in her aptly-titled collection of essays Provocations writes about the "...preoccupation with our own modern period." Did she envision or intend for an essay on her problems with modern university campuses and free speech be used as a defense for the beauty of a tiny little sports film? Maybe not. But I couldn't help but note the relationship between a particular character trait of Rudy's and the way in which that particular trait seems more and more archaic. Without wishing for all to return to how it was, I was reminded of some of the ways in which as a society at large, we did...better. Specifically with attention.

As a culture and country, we used to give better attention. Educators and parents and many people love to bemoan the decreasing attention spans of youth today, and they frequently bemoan these things without offering the best thing they can offer:

themselves as model for what it means to be present and to give your attention, your focus to what's happening in the moment and to what is important to you in the future, and to hone in on that with intensity and drive and purpose and stay after it. 

We've been reading and studying Shakespeare this year with the kids. Not his original words, not yet. That'll come. The wonderful Charles & Mary Lamb adaptations early in the 19th century. Written for children.

Written for children. Designed to "...make the stories of Shakespeare's plays familiar to the young." A focus on plot and character, with simple forays into theme and language was a way to introduce young readers to the beauty of the Bard...and ideally provide a gateway to exploring his work in all its complexity and richness.

Here's the thing: they were written for children at the time. Early 1800s. But now you crack open the first pages and compare them to the majority of children's lit written today, and your first impulse is to say...huh? This isn't for children! It's over their heads! The language is weird and those words are too big for them to understand and they won't be able to follow what's happening and...

Here's the thing though. It's not.

It's not.

Our expectations have changed, and our ability to give attention, to model attention, and to teach attention has changed. In perhaps a not-so-positive-way. The net affect the attention dilution has had is in lowering expectations.

When you lower expectations, you lower people's ability to rise and become their best. Children are still capable of understanding, comprehending, and enjoying Shakespeare - including the Lamb siblings' adaptations - but we need to reframe our expectations of what they're capable of and help show them the importance of sticking with something; of giving attention to something because we know they can. And we know that it will bring them joy, satisfaction, and a sense of competence and confidence once they achieve that threshold. 

That's what Rudy did. He set his sights on something difficult, if not impossible, and went after it. And kept his attention on it.

There's a point where some teammates become irate at him for making him look bad in practice because he's going too hard. He's pushing them too hard. Just chill, man. Slow down. Take it easy. it's just practice.

What does he do?

He stands his ground. He does not back down. No. I will not give less than what I'm capable of. If I don't give you everything I have, then I won't be helping you be as prepared as you can be when it's game time. 

He stands his ground and he demands that his teammates give everything. Starting with their attention and focus in every moment they are preparing.

He's not a great student, but it's imperative that he figure out how to get better grades because if he doesn't, his dream will fail and he'll never play football for Notre Dame.

So he gives his attention, his focus, his everything to whatever will help him achieve that dream. He doesn't do one thing one day, and something else the next, and get distracted by this or that.

He gives his attention. And here's one of the things I love about this movie: he doesn't just give his attention in a big sense to pursuing the dream. He gives his attention in all his interactions with others. Parents, professors, priest, coaches, groundskeeper, friends, teammates. He gives his attention in the moment.

And that is a reminder that is timeless.

SINCERITY

I love Rudy's sincerity; his transparency about his dream. He owns it. He doesn't pretend like it's something that he'd like to happen, but if it doesn't, well...no big deal. No. He lets people know it's everything. He cannot understand why anyone would not give everything they had to be part of something important.

He fights hard and he isn't afraid to let people know when something's gotten to him. When he's betrayed in a big way by people close to him, he doesn't hide or try to disguise how it affects him. It hits him hard and he acknowledges it.

Even as he's made fun of, over and over and over by those close to him, he still keeps his relationships with them, even while they're hurting him. He lets them know in spite of their cynicism, their belief in his inevitable failure, he still keeps coming back to let them know: this is still important to me and I'm still going after it.

He doesn't take the sneering, slouching, post-modern tack of "..whatever."

No. He is not a "whatever" guy. He is a "whatever I need to do" fellow.

SUPPORT

“My whole life, people have been telling me what I could do and couldn’t do. I’ve always listed to ’em, believed in what they said. I don’t wanna do that anymore.”

Who's in his corner? Who's fighting for him? Who's saying you can do it!

Uh, it's a small list. Mostly himself and his indomitable, inextinguishable dream.

I asked the kids, as his family mocked him repeatedly, "...is that the kind of support you'd like to be for your family's dreams?"

He pursued his dream mostly alone. He made some friends and built up respect with his teammates and those around him, but he fought alone. And that is so...

...sad.

We all feel alone at some point. Pretty sure of that.

I feel like the biggest hypocrite in the world when I feel like that - and I do sometimes - because if there is someone who can never use the excuse that "I've done it alone," it's me.

(the face of an active dreamer who has been busy dreaming while working)

I've had incredible support my whole life, beginning with my parents, siblings, family. Unlike Rudy.

He went it alone, and eventually...well, watch the movie.

But how sad is that, to have to pursue your dream alone?

I want to be a dream-enabler.

I want to help be a support system for other people and help provide both emotional and tactical support for their focused dreams.

I don't know if I'll ever be on a stage accepting an Academy Award.

But maybe I'll someday be watching and have somebody say:

"...and thank you to Joseph Long, who listened to me, who supported me, and who believed in my dream. Thank you."

That would mean something to me too.

That's something important to me. To provide dream support with everything I've got to those important to me.

CONVERSATIONS. Christy the Barber and cheap movies.

So what are we doing?
she asked, clippers at the ready;
we made eye contact in the giant mirror as she stood behind me.

Well,
I said.
I'd like some hair cut off. On the sides, and maybe top, and I was thinking of having you make me look cool. Can you do that?

She laughed.
Yep. We'll start with a four-inch and see how that looks.

Okay.
I said.
Cool.

A FEW MINUTES LATER. 
Doing anything fun this summer?
I asked.

No...
she thought carefully.
Watch movies. And my granddaughter is ten months old and I love seeing her a couple times a week. She's so cute. She's standing up now, and saying 'mama' and she'll be walking anytime.

So fun to see them learn new skills!
I said.

And my best friend's moving up from Texas.
she said.
So I'm excited about that. She moved down there so her kids could be closer to their dad. But she couldn't stay. So she's moving back, and her daughter has already been texting me asking if I'll do her hair. She wants to go pink. I said 'fine by me, is your mom cool with it?'

That's great,
I said.
I bet you'll enjoy having your friend back. What do you like doing with her?

Oh, let me see...
she thought.
Mostly hang out, and we watch movies. Yeah, stuff like that.

Any good movies lately?
I asked.

She thought deeply.
No...I can't remember the last one I saw in the theater.

She lowered her voice.
You know, I found this website online where you can watch movies for free. It's great.

Whoa,
I said.
For free?

Yep.
she said proudly, as she snipped away.
Like the movies that are still in the theater. It's way cheaper than paying to go see them. I don't remember what I've seen. I've got, oh, let's see, Netflix, Hulu, all those, plus this website where I watch movies in the theater. I don't remember what I've seen though. I like everything. Except scary movies. My son won't sit next to me in the theater during a scary movie because I'm so loud. I get scared at everything. So I watch the scary movies at home. In my living room.

For free?
I said.

Yep,
she laughed.
For free! It's so much better that way.

*
I thought about asking for a free haircut, as I would prefer that as opposed to paying for it, but decided as she was halfway done, it might not be optimal timing. And when she did finish, I forgot to ask.
*

We spoke of other things, including allergies and how to handle customers who have gross hair. But that's for another time.

And she did make me look cool. Sort of cool. Thanks Christine.

HEY BECCA, HERE'S SOMETHING MARVELOUS,

Hey B,

I’m going to try and say this to you gently, yet include the amount of kind brutality that is warranted in this circumstance.

When you came home last week all excited and authoritarian and informing us, without a vote, that we were “...going to watch Thor” on a school night, then none of us wanted to ruin your exultation, at least in that moment. It was an enjoyable experience, and I am happy that you enjoyed watching it with our children. However, I’d like to provide a little bit of clarity before your hubris concerning your knowledge of the Marvel Cinematic Universe becomes too great. So, a few thoughts to mull before you go asking questions about why Iron Man and the Transformers don’t work together anymore.

- Despite your persistent and insistent belief to the contrary, Spock is not a part of the Marvel Cinematic Universe (MCU).

- As an aside, Spock is also not a part of the Star Wars Universe.

- The sequel to Thor, despite your insistence, is not Thor 2: The Next Generation.

- Again, the sequel to Thor is not Thor: Deep Space Nine.

- Captain Kirk is not secretly Iron Man.

- Star Trek and Star Wars are not interchangeable universes.

Speaking of universes, again, it is so wonderful that you chose to introduce Thor to our children...yet I want to protect you from their judgment, which will certainly occur if you continue on the path of understanding you are currently on.

I don’t want you to feel bad - or rather overly bad - but let’s talk a little about the chronological order of the MCU. It’s great that you got to see Chris Hemsworth shirtless; his body is most certainly a glorious marvel, and has inspired me to start doing push-ups next week, or sometime; but at the risk of sounding ungrateful, you really did a disservice to our children in demanding that they watch Thor before Iron Man. There is a certain order to the Universe , including Marvel’s, and I fear that because of your own ignorance, you may be leading our children down a path where their understanding of important life knowledge, such as the chronology of Marvel’s characters, is upside down. Or rather, tilted. So I will help you, and my hope is that at some point you will choose to help yourself and not willfully wall yourself off from knowledge.

This is the chronology of the films. When you are ready, which is a distant point in the future, then we will address the Marvel television component:

1. Captain America: the First Avenger
2. Iron Man
3. Incredible Hulk - epilogue only
4. Iron Man 2
5. Thor
6. The Avengers
7. Iron Man 3
8. Thor: The Dark World
9. Captain America: the Winter Soldier
10. Guardians of the Galaxy
11. Guardians of the Galaxy 2
12. The Avengers: Age of Ultron
13. Ant-Man
14. Captain America: Civil War
15. Spider-Man: Homecoming
16. Doctor Strange
17. Black Panther*

Again, this is said with affection and more than anything, I want to save you from the brutal judgment of our children in future years and prevent them from looking at you at having led them into a universe of confusion and chaos within the MC. I say this for the children. It’s for them and for their future.

We should probably start watching Iron Man this morning. A good first step would be remembering that he is not a Decepticon.

With all the affection I can muster, given the recent quality of your decision-making,

J

* I have been unable to see yet, but I think this is correct

MOVIES: COLONIA.

If you feel like watching a mesmerizing thriller that will double your heart rate and increase your fury at the ways in which collusions of bastardized religion colliding with political power can be used to abuse, manipulate and control...

...watch Colonia. Inspired by true events*; set in early 1970s Chile against the rise of the brutal Pinochet regime, it tracks a young woman’s foray into a cult to rescue her boyfriend.

After viewing, run to the internets for missing pieces. Chilling, horrific, mesmerizing. And relevant. Perhaps not the exact same scenario repeating, but the interplay between political and religious power and the pathology of following a charismatic tyrant is not exactly stuck in old history books.

Or, there’s always Beauty and the Beast. Emma Watson’s in that one too. Slightly different theme.

*I know, I know

BIRTHDAYS: My Dad.

Dad.

There are so many moments I could choose as a microcosmic explanation of what I think is so great about you, but my current favourite is this: you are the only person in history I know who is torn over which movie to watch on his birthday:

Deadpool or
The Notebook.

And the truth is,
I know that you would truly immerse yourself and thoroughly appreciate either.

My great regrat for today is that I am not there sitting next to you with a bottle of RB watching an impossibly romantic love story with you. Or, we could also do The Notebook.

You are awesomeish. Glad you're my dad. Enjoy the rest.

Sincerely,

Joseph Long (one of your sons)

ALSO, IT'S NOT A DARK STAR.*

I believe in steady improvement. For example, after watching the first Star Wars last month, my wife was finally on track to differentiate between C-3PO and R2-D2.

Sometimes though, improvement feels like light speed reverse. For example, after watching The Empire Strikes Back last night, my wife still cannot keep straight the name of Luke's teacher. Note: his name is "Yoda," NOT "Spock."

All hope is gone.

*the inexplicable inability of my wife's sister to differentiate between a massive weapon of the Empire (Death Star) and the Grateful Dead classic (Dark Star). They are not what I would call Star Wars aficionados.

OSCAR'S ACADEMY AWARDS.

Okay kids.
I said cheerily with an overdose of in-the-know confidence.
One of the cool things about the Academy Awards is that you'll be able to see clips from films that we won't let you watch yet, but that we're excited to see with you someday.

Like what films?
our daughter asked.

Like...The Grand Hotel Budapest.
I said.

You mean,
she asked, not skipping a beat.
The Grand Budapest Hotel?

Uhh, yeah, that's what I meant.
I said.

How did you know that?
She shrug-smiled.
I just know.
she said.

Children are so cool, even with their annoying propensity for getting smarter and funnier faster than they should.

The one awards show I love. Better be a good one.

Oscars? Bah, no big deal.

- Most enjoyable opening in several years. Jack Black is such a great interrupter.

- Supporting Actor.
Score for University of Montana!
Well-deserved W for J.K. Simmons.
And, for possibly the last time tonight, I have a perfect score. One-for-one.

OSCAR AND ME THE GROUCH.
I don't have any regrets about spending an evening watching the Oscars. And I don't have huge regrets over my picks. But I certainly regret that for the next year, I will have to live with my wife gloating about her dominance tonight.

It's just a game.
I say.
It's all luck and educated guesswork.

Except for the years I win. Those years, it's a combination of savvy cultural awareness, crowd psychology dissection, game theory, and intellectual athleticism that is responsible.

But this year?

Luck.

Congratulations, Becca Nutter Long. Savor it. The crown will not be yours for long.

Unless you consider one year a long time, in which case, I guess it will be yours for a while.

Also, I highly recommend locating the animated non-winning shorts The Dam Keeper and Me and My Moulton. Beautiful, both.

LEONARDO DA VINCI THE PORPOISE (HOW TO DO A REMAKE).

Daddy,
he said.
I'm going to make a movie that's sort of like Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles but it's going to be called 'Teenage Mutant Ninja Tortoises.'

Okay.
I said.
Sweet idea. So now you can start writing a script, and then begin drawing up some storyboards. And of course you'll need to line up some funding.

Okay.
he said.
I can start drawing the pictures, but I'll probably need somebody to help me make the pictures move.

Yep.
I said.
We'll start learning some stop motion animation techniques that may be helpful. And what is the story about - how is Teenage Mutant Ninja Tortoises different from Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles?

Well.
he said.
The Teenage Mutant Ninja Tortoises will be fighting a villain who is a colossal squid.

I am so excited about this production.
I said.

And it's true.

SPRING.

I kind of wish Frozen had never been invented,

our daughter said.

I liked watching it once, but now it seems like a bunch of people want to have Frozen parties and wear princess clothes and sing songs from the movie. And I'm tired of it.

I think I know what you mean.

I said.

I liked watching it once too.

FIVE THINGS I'VE LEARNED FROM FILM & TELEVISION THAT I'M MAKING OUR CHILDREN LEARN.

1. Vulcan greeting (Star Trek).
2. Crane Kick (Karate Kid).
3. How to make huge, sweeping statements and melodramatic pronouncements about life's little happenings in poetic and interesting ways (Anne of Green Gables).
4. How to express appreciation for a good meal (What About Bob?).
5. The importance of developing a mysterious and charming smile and doing nice little things for others without recompense or credit (Amelie).
5b. How to show someone you're excited to see them (Elf).
5c. How to sing enthusiastically and un-self consciously in public (Elf).
2b. How to enthusiastically and ambidextrously swordfight while carrying on a conversation (the Princess Bride).
3b. How to sing holiday songs together in an automobile (Christmas Vacation).

Others?

FIVE THINGS I DIG THIS WEEK.

1a. Angelo Badalementi's timeless, haunting title composition for David Lynch's Blue Velvet. Never grow weary of it.

1b. Sea of Bees doing an ultra-catchy, life-affirming cover of Jason "Grandaddy" Lytle's Get Up And Go. Breathtaking, and lyrically, a bit of what I needed: get up and go / you can do it / everything's gonna be alright.

3c. I have a dream. A dream that someday Billy Idol is going to blow my mind with an unbelievably fantastic entire album. As opposed to an unbelievably fantastic single like Rebel Yell or Cradle of Love every fifteen years. I have a dream. In the midnight hour.

2. Red Rising. Pierce Brown's debut novel is a wondrous romp that has drawn references to Ender's Game, Hunger Games, and some accolades from notables in the sci-fi world. The premise isn't earth shattering: man-boy rises from the slave pits of Mars to seek vengeance, then justice on the Society that controls the universe and executed his wife. The bang comes from all the details, relationships, and plot turns that turn what could have been a generic story into a completely captivating joyparade of shifting alliances and strategic maneuvering, all set against a futuristic neo-Greek & Roman inspired civilization that thrives on order, control, obedience, and honor. It wasn't until the last chapter that I realised it was the first in a trilogy...and the second book isn't out until 2015. Aah! 

Side note: Pierce Brown's mom is the first female board member of American Apparel. As Instagram buddies, I know this.

2b. It still boggles my mind that public libraries are REAL. Places you can go, find books (and lots more) you like, scan a card, and voila! Yours to keep. For free. For a while. How can you not utilize something so amazing...and FREE?!

Fort Vancouver Library System, you rock. Seriously. And the crew at the Washougal Community Library? Just double their salaries now, please. Seriously. Jewels.

3. Somebody said this week:

"Joseph, you're looking trim!"

At first, I thought she was talking about my freshly shaved face from a week ago, but then I realised she meant my figure. I started to accept the intended compliment, but then realised I was wearing a baseball hat, which was pushing my hair down on the sides, which in turn was flattening out the side of my body and perpetuating the illusion I was more trim than I am. So I had to, with regret, decline the compliment. But it was a nice thought, and now I'm toying with the idea of getting trim sometime. But it makes me a little nervous to make any deep life changing commitments to myself this far from New Years, so...yeah, I'm going to wait on adding in exercisey stuff into my life for the moment. 

3b.

On the one hand, ventriloquists terrify me. On the other hand, I'm ready to turn it into a career, cold turkey. How do you get started? The children are not impressed with my early efforts. Also, how in the world do you get around those P's and B's without closing your lips? Kinda feel like a dummy.

4. 

Daddy?

he said, laying in bed.

I'm scared, because I always have nightmares.

I'm sorry buddy.

I said, patting his arm. 

Are you okay? Let's come up with something happy for you to think about while you're falling asleep. Okay?

Okay,

he said.

So will you tell me a story? A story about a minotaur with a battle axe, and a snake that's trying to sneak up on him, and there's robbers who are trying to get them and they have poison...

4b.

What are you doing?

I asked them.

We're building a gate.

They said.

Oh.

I said.

Why are you building a gate across our driveway?

Because.

they said.

We're building a gate across the driveway so Mama can't leave. We don't ever want her to leave. 

That is...really sweet.

I said.

But how am I going to get out for work?

It's okay,

They said.

We'll make sure you can get out.

5. There are people who like Jerry Lewis movies. And people who don't. And sadly,  many who have no idea who he is or was. 

I will tell you my new favourite Jerry Lewis film, one that had somehow slid under my radar until recently: 1957's The Delicate Delinquent. Plenty of his cringeworthy manic mumbling, non-sentence finishing and slapstick physical humor...but also a surprisingly prescient, thoughtful, and all-ages accessible narrative dealing with cops, criminals/juvenile delinquents, and rehabilitation. Archaic on the surface (cops walking beats, 50s juvenile gang cliches, gender pigeonholing), but some tenderness and moments of provoking thought as well. And, plenty of scenes the kids were laughing at loud really loud (LOLRL) at. Good flick.

5b. 

You know what I feel like doing tonight?

I asked my wife; our smiles a little road weary after a long week.

I just feel like watching some television. Just laying on the couch and...watching television. If I could choose something to do, that would probably be it. 

In like a diving peregrine, she swooped; her voice reminiscent of jet engine in front of a giant megaphone; the guilt and betrayal screeched into every syllable:

DADDY! HOW DARE YOU?! BOOKS ARE WAY BETTER THAN TELEVISION! I CAN'T BELIEVE YOU SAID THAT!!

I hung my head, and smiled a little, and television never happened. 

But tomorrow night...tomorrow. Maybe tomorrow.

The End.

CONVERSATIONS. movies, coffee, high school.

How is your morning going?
I asked the barista.

Pretty good.
She said.
I'll be off in an hour, and then I'm going to watch movies all day.

Nice!
I said.
What are you going to watch?

I got some five dollar movies at Walmart.
She said.
I got The Wild West with Will Smith...

...and Kenneth Branagh.
I added.

Yep. I used to have it on VHS but
I don't have a player for it now. And then...some Looney Tunes. They help me go to sleep. What are you doing this morning?

Well.
I said.
I teach a couple classes and so I'm going to get some things prepped for next year.

Oh.
She said.
That's cool. I had a history teacher in high school. He was so cool. I'd skip all the time and he didn't even care. As long as I got the work in he was fine with it. He was really cool.

Oh.
I said.
I'm not completely sure I agree, but have fun with the movies!

And I drove away, with some very good coffee, which she has learned to make very well. For my birthday, I would kind of like to watch films all day. But probably not The Wild Wild West. Also, to preempt any questions, my birthday is in September.

FIVE THOUGHTS CONCERNING WHAT ABOUT BOB?

1. We were on a medium-sized road trip* recently, and a conversation sprung up about our favourite funniest films. I brought up the Bill Murray/Richard Dreyfuss classic What About Bob? The children peppered me with questions, having not seen it, and twenty minutes later I had somehow explained the entire plot, with a short foray into what it is that psychiatrists do; an explanation that would likely not sit well with Mr. Thomas Cruise.

2. Upon returning home, I discovered that we still had a copy of the film. On VHS. Somehow, it escaped getting thrown out with the Spring cleaning this year.**

3. The first time I remember seeing it was with my oldest friend, Matt, on a Sunday morning. I thought it was hilarious then, but on every subsequent viewing it has only gotten better. One of the only other films immediately coming to mind that has gotten better with repeat viewings is Silence of the Lambs which, in my opinion, is not as funny as What About Bob.

3b. ONE OF MY FAVOURITE EXCHANGES IN CINEMATIC HISTORY (thank you, Jen, for the reminder  )

"But you said in your office I could call you Leo."

- "That was my office. In my home, I'd like you to call me Dr. Marvin."

4. At the supper table, the children ganged up on me, which is frequent, and my daughter started giggling away and suggested to all that "...we should start calling Daddy 'Bob Wiley.'"

It was pretty funny, so I had to take a break from loudly savoring my food to laugh. A little. But Bob did help affirm an important lesson to us all: let people know, enthusiastically, when they've done something you appreciate.

4b. Bob is the protagonist...but it is easy to forget that despite how lovable he is by the middle of the film, he is still basically a weird creepo guy - I do not use that description prolifically or casually - with a bunch of issues who has lied his way into stalking his psychiatrist's FAMILY on their holiday. This film isn't that far from Cape Fear, or a hundred other psycho killer films, as far as initial setup goes. And it wouldn't have taken a whole lot in the first 20 minutes to turn a light comedy into something much darker.

(for example: One Hour Photo with Robin Williams. Incidentally, Mr. Williams was in early conversations to play Dr. Marvin, as was Woody Allen.)

I'm glad they went in the direction they did with it. I can definitely sympathize with Dr. Marvin a bit as he watches his family fall in love with his patient. It's his supreme condescension, arrogance and anger that really helps cement our empathy/sympathy for Bob.

5. I'm glad they didn't go with "What About Robert?" I just don't think I could have taken it as seriously.

5b. I'm a strong proponent of the field of counseling. I'm always intrigued by the relationships, commonalities, approaches, and overlaps among psychiatrists, psychologists, counselors, and therapists. As somebody who values semantics, semiotics, and use of language, I tend to inwardly roll my eyes (yes: latent contempt; sorry) when I hear the notion of "counseling" tossed around casually, like it's a skill that can just be casually picked up, or a gift that somebody who gives really good advice has...INSTEAD of a profession, complete with licensing, education, oversight, and confidentiality protocols. Unfairly, I have used it first as a verb (counseled, counseling) versus a noun (a counselor, i.e. therapist in this context). But the point remains that I have heard so many times the idea of people in various other professions implying or referring to the idea of counseling as an additional skill you just sort of...integrate into your current profession, as opposed to a stand-alone field with its own set of stringent professional qualifications and responsibilities, not least of which is, AGAIN, that idea of patient confidentiality. Did I just use a 1991 Frank Oz film as a vehicle to make a very unsubtle statement about something I have strong feelings about, in large part because I have a mother and brother who work in the field? Why...yes I did.

2b. I also told the children the story of The Goonies. I cannot wait to watch it with them...someday. In the meantime, I've just pulled up the movie poster on Google, and we look longingly at it and they pepper me with questions about Chunk. So good.

2c. SAVE THE DATE: July 2, 2016. Spielberg's interpretation of Roald Dahl's The BFG hits theatres. Can. Not. Wait. My expectations are high.

Have a great Friday, and don't forget to double-feature Bob and Ghostbusters this weekend.


*four hours
**and the last fifteen years

FIVE THOUGHTS CONCERNING WHAT ABOUT BOB?

1. We were on a medium-sized road trip* recently, and a conversation sprung up about our favourite funniest films. I brought up the Bill Murray/Richard Dreyfuss classic What About Bob? The children peppered me with questions, having not seen it, and twenty minutes later I had somehow explained the entire plot, with a short foray into what it is that psychiatrists do; an explanation that would likely not sit well with Mr. Thomas Cruise.

2. Upon returning home, I discovered that we still had a copy of the film. On VHS. Somehow, it escaped getting thrown out with the Spring cleaning this year.**

3. The first time I remember seeing it was with my oldest friend, Matt, on a Sunday morning. I thought it was hilarious then, but on every subsequent viewing it has only gotten better. One of the only other films immediately coming to mind that has gotten better with repeat viewings is Silence of the Lambs which, in my opinion, is not as funny as What About Bob.

3b. ONE OF MY FAVOURITE EXCHANGES IN CINEMATIC HISTORY (thank you, Jen, for the reminder  )

"But you said in your office I could call you Leo."

- "That was my office. In my home, I'd like you to call me Dr. Marvin."

4. At the supper table, the children ganged up on me, which is frequent, and my daughter started giggling away and suggested to all that "...we should start calling Daddy 'Bob Wiley.'"

It was pretty funny, so I had to take a break from loudly savoring my food to laugh. A little. But Bob did help affirm an important lesson to us all: let people know, enthusiastically, when they've done something you appreciate.

4b. Bob is the protagonist...but it is easy to forget that despite how lovable he is by the middle of the film, he is still basically a weird creepo guy - I do not use that description prolifically or casually - with a bunch of issues who has lied his way into stalking his psychiatrist's FAMILY on their holiday. This film isn't that far from Cape Fear, or a hundred other psycho killer films, as far as initial setup goes. And it wouldn't have taken a whole lot in the first 20 minutes to turn a light comedy into something much darker.

(for example: One Hour Photo with Robin Williams. Incidentally, Mr. Williams was in early conversations to play Dr. Marvin, as was Woody Allen.)

I'm glad they went in the direction they did with it. I can definitely sympathize with Dr. Marvin a bit as he watches his family fall in love with his patient. It's his supreme condescension, arrogance and anger that really helps cement our empathy/sympathy for Bob.

5. I'm glad they didn't go with "What About Robert?" I just don't think I could have taken it as seriously.

5b. I'm a strong proponent of the field of counseling. I'm always intrigued by the relationships, commonalities, approaches, and overlaps among psychiatrists, psychologists, counselors, and therapists. As somebody who values semantics, semiotics, and use of language, I tend to inwardly roll my eyes (yes: latent contempt; sorry) when I hear the notion of "counseling" tossed around casually, like it's a skill that can just be casually picked up, or a gift that somebody who gives really good advice has...INSTEAD of a profession, complete with licensing, education, oversight, and confidentiality protocols. Unfairly, I have used it first as a verb (counseled, counseling) versus a noun (a counselor, i.e. therapist in this context). But the point remains that I have heard so many times the idea of people in various other professions implying or referring to the idea of counseling as an additional skill you just sort of...integrate into your current profession, as opposed to a stand-alone field with its own set of stringent professional qualifications and responsibilities, not least of which is, AGAIN, that idea of patient confidentiality. Did I just use a 1991 Frank Oz film as a vehicle to make a very unsubtle statement about something I have strong feelings about, in large part because I have a mother and brother who work in the field? Why...yes I did.

2b. I also told the children the story of The Goonies. I cannot wait to watch it with them...someday. In the meantime, I've just pulled up the movie poster on Google, and we look longingly at it and they pepper me with questions about Chunk. So good.

2c. SAVE THE DATE: July 2, 2016. Spielberg's interpretation of Roald Dahl's The BFG hits theatres. Can. Not. Wait. My expectations are high.

Have a great Friday, and don't forget to double-feature Bob and Ghostbusters this weekend.


*four hours
**and the last fifteen years

BUSTER KEATON, FROZEN, MATHEMATICS UND MEMORIAM.

The first time I remember seeing a silent film was at the now-extinct Organ Grinder; a pizza parlor with mediocre food, but a million-dollar organ that soundtracked Charlie Chaplin shorts shown on a projector loop. I loved them.

A movie called Frozen came out last year. Finally saw it a couple months ago. Dug it. Good flick. I think it found an audience.

Recently, I pulled out a film for family cinema night, and the children waited with bait breath and grins for the evening's cinematic surprise to reveal itself. I chose...

...The General. Buster Keaton's 1927 classic black-and-white silent masterpiece about a Civil War engineer trying to rescue his train and his woman from Union spies (yes, he's not exactly on the right side of history here, but in this case, it's beside the point. See Das Boot for further elucidation on this).

The children did nothing to disguise their disappointment and disgust. Fortunately, I am strong of soul and thick of skin and I am father, so I know what's best. We proceeded.

When I was in college, I had to take Calculus. It was very, very hard for me. I have come to love mathematics since, but my brain does not inherently process topics such as Calculus well. I had to work extremely hard just to receive a middling grade, and I think the professor was rather surprised at how jubilant I was at this middling grade. But I was. I worked hard for it, and it forced my brain to learn to process information in a way that was not natural or easy for me, and I came to respect and appreciate the thought process behind it. I don't think people who understand Calculus easily are necessarily smarter than many people whose inherent skills lie in other areas, but they certainly have my respect, and possibly envy. 

I had to do a fair amount of explaining the first twenty minutes of The General. A 21st century kid doesn't necessarily grow up immersed in the language and style of silent films, with their frequently drawn-out sight gags, title cards, and melodramatic interactions. But by 30 minutes in, they were fully engaged; laughing uproariously, cringing with suspense, anxiously awaiting the resolution of our hero's fight for love and honor.

The General is a tough film to watch 80+ years on, when you are accustomed to a very post-modern reliance on snappy dialogue, snappier visuals, self-realization, and, uhh, actual color  I love so much about film over the last quarter century; I am not a purist or a traditionalist in that sense. But I am someone who LOVES history in general, and who believes strongly in the value of trying to recognize, acknowledge, understand, and remember what has come before. Cinema might seem a trite thing to speak of on Memorial Day weekend, but to me the principle of acknowledging the past; the sacrifices, the early pioneers of what make our lives possible today in terms of big things (independence, freedom) and little things (cinema, culture at large) is one that is...important. So easy to accept what we have now without looking backwards to see how it came to be.

I'm okay pushing kids a bit outside The Now; I could care less about making sure they're up on every hot movie or hip song or cool toy; I don't want to constantly shield them from all access or awareness, but I want there to always be an understanding that interesting things and ideas are not just indigenous to RIGHT NOW; that there are whole worlds beyond the stretch of the immediate present that can, with education and attention, come to be deeply appreciated. And sometimes even end up being very enjoyable. But they might require a little work; a little investment of time and a willingness to set expectations aside and...work a bit to enjoy them. 

It's easy to enjoy the things that are a reflection of our world and culture today. Really sweet little movies like Frozen that possess charm, amazing visuals, and a bit of a contemporary counter-culture message. I think it's a little* harder to enjoy things that are out of date, that push you into a world that's not familiar or contemporary or easily understandable. 

We were driving along this weekend, talking about our favourite funny films. My daughter, amidst a handful of others, included:

"...the one with Buster Keaton and the train. What was it called?...oh yeah, The General."

My heart leapt, and I promised myself to go shopping for some Marx Brothers this week...

Thank you, to the many, who have looked out for your loved ones as well as strangers; who have sacrificed and paved way for the lives we enjoy now; whose actions in the past are too-frequently forgotten in the excitement and hubris of the now. Thank you. 

Also, thank you, Mr. Newton, for inventing Calculus. I'm still not that good at it, but it is very good exercise for my brain, and I have learned to appreciate it a lot...and enjoy it a little.

May you all have a peaceful resolution to the long weekend. Au revoir.

*lot

REVIEW: About Time

is a little film by the English fellow Richard Curtis, and addresses time travel, though not in the Stephen Hawking, Terminator, Dr. Who, or Primer sense.

(This contains almost no spoilers)

It is a little story about love in three distinct dynamics:

- a boy in love with a girl,*

- a son's relationship with his father (Bill Nighy in a role that will probably have me tearing up a bit more every time I see it),

- the eternal time travel questions of repeatable experiences: will repeating a first experience again for the first time make life better?

It's rather oddly structured as it moves around in time, often with huge leaps, and the logic is largely absent, as it is with most stories involving time travel. But - the best stories involving time travel usually find clever ways of making you not care about the logical fallacies, or address holes in such simple fashion that you can shrug, move along and enjoy the story without getting hung up on the feasibility. It ends up as more of a coming-of-age love story spanning decades that happens to have time travel as its catalyst than it is a time travel movie with a big idea and big villain. The butterfly effect scenarios are integral, of course, and conveniently ignore its own internal laws of TT (time travel). It owes a huge and obvious debt to Groundhog Day, though its tone is softer, sappier, and has red-haired people.

Quite enjoyed it. If you liked Frequency, Love, Actually, or movies with Rachel McAdams and beautiful houses overlooking English seashores and misanthropic supporting characters, then you might enjoy it too. Lovely, simple, sweet, funny, sentimental in the right places, and big important idea about life stuck in at the end.

Also, I try to keep track of who recommends film, books, and music to me, and I remember someone telling me two months ago that they thought I would enjoy this...but I do not remember who, and I am not done inventing my own time machine to go back and figure it out. Thank you, and my apologies. You can speak up now...

And by the way, they have to have spent a small fortune paying for the killer soundtrack. Somebody loves The Waterboys**.

*great chemistry with the leads

**huge fan here

...I HOPE THAT TOADS START CRAWLING ALL OVER YOUR FACE.

We have started watching Anne of Green Gables for our Thursday Night Cinema Series, and I am suddenly missing my Grandpa.

I suppose I certainly see Anne as a kindred spirit not only in terms of melodramatic musings and wonderfully imaginative insults, but heightened sensitivity to the importance of spelling a name correctly.

And following the example of people like Matthew and my Grandpa, maybe I will try to be a little more kind for a while, at least until someone is mean, at which point I will wish something dreadful upon them (see title above).

CONVERSATIONS: WANDA*: IN WHICH WE SPEAK OF FROZEN, EQUILIBRIUM, AND INSOMNIAC CHRISTIAN BALE.

WANDA.
I have a great difficulty passing certain things by, such as cookie samples, or people playing accordions in the street,

or a Redbox booth, even if I'm not planning to rent anything which I wasn't, but the woman next to me at the other kiosk peered intently at me - 60s, silvery-white hair streaked with blue, pretty and Bohemia-ish and asked if I had seen Frozen. 

- Why yes, I just saw it a few weeks ago.
I said.

Aah, wasn't it delightful!
She exclaimed, clapping her hands together, then turning back to her kiosk. The scene where she finds out what true love truly is...wasn't it just magical?! Wasn't it? It was, wasn't it?!

Yes.
I said.
And she put up her hand for me to high-five.
I did.

She continued:
Now, I'm thinking about getting this new film with Christian Bale, but I don't know if it's going to be any good. Do you know what is SUCH a wonderful film?!

Enthusiastically, she forged ahead to answer her own question:
It's an older one with Christian Bale and it's sci-fi and - 

I interrupted:
Are you talking about Equilibrium?

Yes!
Her big smile got biggest.
Isn't it SO GOOD?! The scene where he confronts the authorities, and where she goes into the furnace...what a wonderful film! Do you have any recommendations of other ones with Christian Bale like that? Ones that aren't just all...violence and horror, but really good stories and...gritty?

Well,
I said.
Have you seen The Machinist?

No!!
She clapped her hands.
Is it good? What is it about?

Well,
I said.
I don't want to say too much, but it's a sort of...psychological thriller about a man who hasn't slept for weeks and can't figure out what's happening to him. It's dark, and definitely gritty, but it's a very good story and intelligent and although there's a bit of violence, it's very motivated and integral to the story when it does appear. It is quite a unique film.

That sounds perfect!
She said.
I'm going to find it so I can watch it. The Machinist?

Yes.
I said.

And it has Christian Bale?

Yes.
I said.

Wonderful!
She said. 
Thank you, I'm going to watch it!

Wonderful!
I said.
Have a good one, and perhaps our paths will cross again one of these days.

And they did, later at the Post Office.
____


*Not her real name, unless she purposely gave me a false name and the name I changed her name to at the top turned out to be her actual real name.


MANIFESTO ALA MODE; SANS RANT.
Of course I don't judge a book by its cover, but I certainly judge it by its typeface choice used for the body text.

And now that I think about it, I actually do judge books by their covers as well. Enough with all the photographs - don't strip away my imagination; give me a taste of what's inside a good novel through tasteful use of texture, illustration, typography, and design rather than wunderkind sharp-jawed models that show me exactly how pretty the supposedly flawed protagonists are supposed to be.

(and please, any design students out there: I'm weary of Comic Sans putdowns; shouting that you loathe a font every other designer already loathes is so making me start to fall in love...almost)

I LIKE ICY IKE.

Told the children several days ago that we would watch Frozen tonight -

which they have yet to see - if they were incredibly helpful, kind, made a bunch of money, etc. Anyway, I just got back and presented the rental case to my daughter, overjoyed, who opened it up to discover...

...a documentary about Dwight Eisenhower that looks fascinating! Apparently the discs got switched,* and I personally am very excited and have been explaining all about the interstate system and military industrial complex. I think they're a little disappointed, but we'll see if the other one shows up. We shall see.thy might really enjoy it, maybe. I know I will. Long live Ike. 

* I may or may not** be responsible 

** I am

GRAVITY PREQUEL.

After I saw Pixar's Up for the first time in 2009, I thought it was one of the best films of the year.

After viewing it for a second time over the last several nights with my children, I realise I was mistaken.

One of the best films of the last decade. Adventure, friendship, occasional hilarity, and a constant reminder of the beautiful, raw, authentic, painful, joy of Love over time.

Timeless.